Grieving
Use this to grieve a loss with God, even one you've never called a loss. Write out your prayers, what you hear from him, or both.
A loss you never grieve doesn't go away. It keeps a quiet hold on you. This is how you start to loosen it.
- One loss at a time.Pick one. You can come back for another.
- Be honest.God can handle your real questions. The Psalms are full of them.
- Take breaks.This can stir up a lot. Stop whenever you want and come back later.
Not sure what to grieve?
Not every loss looks like one. Some are things that happened, like a death, a breakup, or a job that ended. Others are things that never happened, and those are easy to miss. They're real too, and they shouldn't be ignored. Start with one of these.
- What's something you feel you deserved and didn't get?
- What's something you miss that you don't get to experience?
1God is for you in this
Grieving starts here. God isn't far off from your pain. He's with you in it, right now.
Pick one of these verses and write it out. Writing it slows you down enough to let it land.
Look up one: Psalm 34:18 · Matthew 11:28-30 · Psalm 147:3 · Psalm 73:26 · 2 Corinthians 1:3-4
Tap one to read it.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.Psalm 34:18 (NIV)
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV)
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.Psalm 147:3 (NIV)
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.Psalm 73:26 (NIV)
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (NIV)
2Your bold lament
A lament is an honest prayer about what hurts. It doesn't tidy anything up or rush to the happy ending. Tell God the whole thing.
3Ask God to restore
Tell God what you want back. Then listen.
Losses teach us things. “I'm on my own.” “God doesn't see me.” “It was my fault.” Write down whatever this one taught you.
Ask God to replace it with what's true, and write what comes.
Ask what he might have been saying back then, even if you couldn't hear it at the time.
Who can you tell?
When it's too big
Some grief is more than a worksheet can hold. That's normal, and you don't have to carry it alone.
Licensed counselors who walk with people through grief and loss. Your first 15-minute call is free. They take most insurance and have a sliding scale.
Get started, call (732) 889-3712, or email counseling@hobokengrace.com
Hoboken Grace's Care Team walks with people through loss. Email care@hobokengrace.com